I agonized over my Halloween costumes. I wanted wit, a door-answerer who did two or three takes before figuring out who I was and then chuckling to himself, but I also wanted to do the minimum amount of work necessary. Case in point, I was four when I came up with this one. Can anyone guess what Jean and I are here?
We are NOT Raggedy Ann and Andy!
As I got older, my work ethic decreased and my desire for candy increased. I only wanted costumes that incorporated my regular clothes and allowed me to carry pillowcases. In ’85, I became Clark Kent by adding a hat and a pocket protector with Clark Kent written on it. In ’86, I was Rollie Fingers with a handlebar mustache and my normal baseball uniform. In ’87, I became Don Johnson by wearing a pastel shirt and taking off my glasses.
In ’88, I decided that I had been working way too much on my Halloween costumes. My glasses had broken at the temple and had been taped up for two weeks. I added another piece of masking tape to the bridge of the glasses. I wore my regular clothes, but hiked up one pant leg and tucked it into my sock. I took my Clark Kent pocket protector and filled it with pens. I walked out to show my mom.
She looked at me askance. “What are you this year?” she asked.
“Mooom! I’m a nerd!”
She laughed at me. “Jim, I don’t think you exactly get the concept of Halloween,” she said.
“Do you think anyone will recognize me?”
“Not if you comb your hair.”
I had forgotten about my hair. It was usually a mess, but I was pretty sure nerds had neat hair. It was too bad there weren’t any nerds around to ask. I ran back to the bathroom and combed my hair.
—
And now it’s Zach’s turn. His mom wanted to dress him up like a hick from Kansas, replete with overalls and a flannel. And while she met the minimum amount of work requirement, I didn’t want him wearing his church clothes out where they might get dirty.
So we went back to the drawing board.
He filled that basket up!
He roared like a pirate and nobody guessed all night what Zach was. Thoughts?
Stories About My Life, 92% True 
It’s pretty much my favorite animal.
(try around 25 seconds in)
I thought he might be one of the little critters from the Star Wars movies.
You and Jean are Jack ‘n Jill … haven’t a guess about Zach.
Yes! We were Jack and Jill. Zach wasn’t an ewok, but a liger. Half lion/ half tiger. I read about them when I was little and they intrigued me. They didn’t come to fame until Napoleon Dynamite.
“Do you think anyone will recognize me?”
“Not if you comb your hair”
I’m still laughing!
Zach is a cutie – thanks to his Mom for filling us in; I wasn’t going to admit that I didn’t know!
One of your best Halloween costumes, but you forgot to mention the toilet paper trailing from your pants.
I forgot about the toilet paper! It probably wasn’t part of the costume. In ’88, Halloween landed on a Monday and I usually had toilet paper trailing from my pants on Mondays.